Recalibration

Tonight, as I ought to be sleeping, I have thoughts of thankfulness running through my head . . . thankfulness for recalibration some might say . . .

Well it goes like this you know when you walk through life sometimes and you end up having experiences, feelings and awairness' pile up on each other? Sorta like a congo line in first grade that comes to a complete and abrupt stop. Its messy, jostling and fun, but no one really understood or experienced deeply the minutes of giggle that followed or just sorta goofily reenacted it over and over. I think life for me can get like that sometimes, just silly skating or goofy fumbling . . . not really focused or purposeful just well sorta routine or even worse numb robotics.

I get up, eat, go to school, pray-study-read, study arabic, hang out with people. Some days though I can do that with out being all the way there maybe when I am talking to someone, I can leave that conversation and ask myself what just happened there? Or I space out in class and not really understand something or I can ride everyday past friend and strangers alike and never really have seen them . . . robotics.

But recently in one area the Lord gave me the generous gift of recalibration. I had one drone-like way of expecting this one thing and way to low standard of expectation and he straight blew that away with a really amazing version!!! Its like having a frozen grocery store brand cheese burger with waxy cheese verses like an IN-n-Out burger, soft bun, greasy patty that makes grease heavenly and artistic, just the right amounts of condiments . . . just a great burger!! The two are no longer comparable and you now have a much better flavor in your mouth!

While I feel there are excellent nuggets of truth for us to excel in the external way we walk through life, I mainly feel this 'congo line crash' inside. I find myself having way to many things piled in the 'I will think that through later' pile, and I fear that as those things turn back into brain slime waiting for me to tend to them, that I might loose out on some lovely little truth! A mind is truely a terrible thing to waste.

I long to walk through life using all my faculties and really seeing deeply into people as they are and loving them as Christ loves them! Some days are better than others, we all feel that, for sure! But for me through this one little area of recalibration, I am feeling its rippling effect through my whole heart and spirit. It seemed like a sweet little gift, at first, but more and more its tentacles of love break loose the hard, numb, even lazy places in my heart, warming it a new as only the Lord can. I think that numbness living in the muslim world is a risk, a quiet foe, but tonight it's fully exposed for its folly for Jesus is bigger.

As we journey together for truth's sake.